When I came out of the closet in 1990, cousin Sheila was one of the first phone calls I made. I had been told many years earlier she was Sapphic (can you believe that this Web site doesn't let me use the L-word?), but wasn't sure how "out" she was so I called her sister Barbara who said "Sure! Call her." And it was very nice to have that connection with a relative who had something in common at a time that was both scary and exhilarating for me.

I also remember visiting Sheila in Prescott when I was driving from Phoenix to a friend's weddding in Sedona. We ate at Red Lobster and swapped stories about family members and she told me all about her synagogue, which she was president of at the time.

You'll be missed, cousin Sheila.